Relationship suicide.

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Do you ever get upset for no reason? Something that made you extremely happy, now it doesn’t exist. You want to have it back so badly, to feel complete again. You know you’re doing fine, still not great.

Lack of focus, day dreaming all day! That exactly what you do to me. Can’t you just leave my mind for a second to let me smile again, please?

What if I say I still desire you, you’d still be my initial? Even after everything you did.

I’m looking for you in everyone else, but I can’t find you, can’t find someone close to you, nothing at all. I’m desperate.

I feel I’m missing a part of your life, I wanna be there in your cheerfulness, I wanna be there in your grief, I wanna be there when you’re under the weather, I wanna be there to cheer you up, I wanna be there in your birthdays I wanna be there so badly it tears me up when I know I can’t. Nothing I could say to make you stay.
I swear I never let you go, you just pushed me hard the last time. I know I promised I’ll always be there, but tell what could I do when everything proves you don’t want me? Shows that you would give up on me in any second.
Unlike you, I never wanted to lose you. I’d just do nothing to get you back, because I have done enough. Sorry love, but yes I’d do nothing.

After forever, would you recognize me? Would you stand there and be proud of me? Or would you call me a sinner, a loser not a winner? Would you point me out to your friends and say gladly ‘that’s my first love’?

No one would possibly understand me like you do, so don’t mistake my nothingness by un-forgiveness. Because the rest of the world would that. But with all of those broken hearts, I would walk away.
-SA.

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